Reciprocity is not a two-way street

By all means: Give to others without expecting anything in return.

Send them presents for no reason, buy their books, invite them over, go see them, take their online quizzes, “like” their cat videos, eat their vegan cookies, attend their out-of-town niece’s wedding shower and bring a surprisingly perfect gift for the bride even though you’ve never met her or heard of her before, and hug them.

It’s the only way to thrive in the giving.

You’ll move forward more exhilarated than ever — feeling even more free than if you’d never had the opportunity to give.

Paradoxically: Don’t get in the habit of taking from others and thinking they shouldn’t expect anything in return.

Not only will: Giving back make you feel rapturously alive

And: Others glow.

But also it’s worth noting: Over time, a healthy human will not want to support you if you never think of them in return.

And this is right and natural. So please don’t feel bad if you don’t want to keep giving to a one-way relationship. Yes, unconditional giving IS a glory. But thinking others should unconditionally give to YOU is icky.

Paradox’s Corollary: Just because you think you give and give and give to someone does not mean they have to give back.

If nothing comes back in return, you might assess whether or not the truth of the situation is opposite of what you think — in which case you can start giving more.

OR. They might — gulp — not be into doing this with you. Leave them be. There are others — out there somewhere — who will want you have to give. I guarantee. Just go back to your own self, find clearness and joy, and then “by all means” (above).

Because the greatest news is: Human beings can’t get enough of joyfully exchanging things with each other — ideas, money, kisses, belongings, food, favors, head pats. Deep within our cells, it feels very good. Yum.

PS — Don’t be ashamed if you have done, are doing, or haven’t done any of the above. We all have/are/don’t at times! Or at least I have/am/don’t. And that was just this morning. Gulp (again). I am pretty sure it goes with the territory — being human — and it’s worth it. Yum (again).

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2 Responses to Reciprocity is not a two-way street

  1. Shelley says:

    You are a give, give, giver!! Hope I am too!! 🙂

  2. Betsy says:

    You are, Miss Shelley: Bread, eggs, homes, ideas, time, smiles…. it is awe inspiring to me! You set the bar high:)

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